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ASSOCIATION WITH THE WISE
by
Bhikkhu Bodhi
BPS Newsletter Cover Essay #26 (1st Mailing 1994)
Copyright 1994 Buddhist Publication Society
* * *
DharmaNet Edition 1994
This electronic edition is offered for free distribution
via DharmaNet by arrangement with the publisher.
DharmaNet International
P.O. Box 4951, Berkeley CA 94704-4951
* * *
The Mahamangala Sutta, the Great Discourse on Blessings, is one of the
most popular Buddhist suttas, included in all the standard repertories
of Pali devotional chants. The sutta begins when a deity of stunning
beauty, having descended to earth in the stillness of the night,
approaches the Blessed One in the Jeta Grove and asks about the way to
the highest blessings. In the very first stanza of his reply the
Buddha states that the highest blessing comes from avoiding fools and
associating with the wise (//asevana ca balanam, panditanan ca
sevana//). Since the rest of the sutta goes on to sketch all the
different aspects of human felicity, both mundane and spiritual, the
assignment of association with the wise to the opening stanza serves
to emphasize a key point: that progress along the path of the Dhamma
hinges on making the right choices in our friendships.
Contrary to certain psychological theories, the human mind is not a
hermetically sealed chamber enclosing a personality unalterably shaped
by biology and infantile experience. Rather, throughout life it
remains a highly malleable entity continually remolding itself in
response to its social interactions. Far from coming to our personal
relationships with a fixed and immutable character, our regular and
repeated social contacts implicate us in a constant process of
psychological osmosis that offers precious opportunities for growth
and transformation. Like living cells engaged in a chemical dialogue
with their colleagues, our minds transmit and receive a steady barrage
of messages and suggestions that may work profound changes even at
levels below the threshold of awareness.
Particularly critical to our spiritual progress is our selection of
friends and companions, who can have the most decisive impact upon our
personal destiny. It is because he perceived how susceptible our minds
can be to the influence of our companions that the Buddha repeatedly
stressed the value of good friendship (//kalyanamittata//) in the
spiritual life. The Buddha states that he sees no other thing that is
so much responsible for the arising of unwholesome qualities in a
person as bad friendship, nothing so helpful for the arising of
wholesome qualities as good friendship (AN I.vii,10; I.viii,1). Again,
he says that he sees no other external factor that leads to so much
harm as bad friendship, and no other external factor that leads to so
much benefit as good friendship (AN I.x,13,14). It is through the
influence of a good friend that a disciple is led along the Noble
Eightfold Path to release from all suffering (SN 45:2).
Good friendship, in Buddhism, means considerably more than associating
with people that one finds amenable and who share one's interests. It
means in effect seeking out wise companions to whom one can look for
guidance and instruction. The task of the noble friend is not only to
provide companionship in the treading of the way. The truly wise and
compassionate friend is one who, with understanding and sympathy of
heart, is ready to criticize and admonish, to point out one's faults,
to exhort and encourage, perceiving that the final end of such
friendship is growth in the Dhamma. The Buddha succinctly expresses
the proper response of a disciple to such a good friend in a verse of
the Dhammapada: "If one finds a person who points out one's faults and
who reproves one, one should follow such a wise and sagacious
counselor as one would a guide to hidden treasure" (Dhp. 76).
Association with the wise becomes so crucial to spiritual development
because the example and advice of a noble-minded counselor is often
the decisive factor that awakens and nurtures the unfolding of our own
untapped spiritual potential. The uncultivated mind harbors a vast
diversity of unrealized possibilities, ranging from the depths of
selfishness, egotism and aggressivity to the heights of wisdom,
self-sacrifice and compassion. The task confronting us, as followers
of the Dhamma, is to keep the unwholesome tendencies in check and to
foster the growth of the wholesome tendencies, the qualities that lead
to awakening, to freedom and purification. However, our internal
tendencies do not mature and decline in a vacuum. They are subject to
the constant impact of the broader environment, and among the most
powerful of these influences is the company we keep, the people we
look upon as teachers, advisors and friends. Such people silently
speak to the hidden potentials of our own being, potentials that will
either unfold or wither under their influence.
In our pursuit of the Dhamma it therefore becomes essential for us to
choose as our guides and companions those who represent, at least in
part, the noble qualities we seek to internalize by the practice of
the Dhamma. This is especially necessary in the early stages of our
spiritual development, when our virtuous aspirations are still fresh
and tender, vulnerable to being undermined by inward irresolution or
by discouragement from acquaintances who do not share our ideals. In
this early phase our mind resembles a chameleon, which alters its
color according to its background. Just as this remarkable lizard
turns green when in the grass and brown when on the ground, so we
become fools when we associate with fools and sages when we associate
with sages. Internal changes do not generally occur suddenly; but
slowly, by increments so slight that we ourselves may not be aware of
them, our characters undergo a metamorphosis that in the end may prove
to be dramatically significant.
If we associate closely with those who are addicted to the pursuit of
sense pleasures, power, riches and fame, we should not imagine that we
will remain immune from those addictions: in time our own minds will
gradually incline to these same ends. If we associate closely with
those who, while not given up to moral recklessness, live their lives
comfortably adjusted to mundane routines, we too will remain stuck in
the ruts of the commonplace. If we aspire for the highest -- for the
peaks of transcendent wisdom and liberation -- then we must enter into
association with those who represent the highest. Even if we are not
so fortunate as to find companions who have already scaled the
heights, we can well count ourselves blessed if we cross paths with a
few spiritual friends who share our ideals and who make earnest
efforts to nurture the noble qualities of the Dhamma in their hearts.
When we raise the question how to recognize good friends, how to
distinguish good advisors from bad advisors, the Buddha offers us
crystal-clear advice. In the Shorter Discourse on a Full-Moon Night
(MN 110) he explains the difference between the companionship of the
bad person and the companionship of the good person. The bad person
chooses as friends and companions those who are without faith, whose
conduct is marked by an absence of shame and moral dread, who have no
knowledge of spiritual teachings, who are lazy and unmindful, and who
are devoid of wisdom. As a consequence of choosing such bad friends as
his advisors, the bad person plans and acts for his own harm, for the
harm of others, and the harm of both, and he meets with sorrow and
misery.
In contrast, the Buddha continues, the good person chooses as friends
and companions those who have faith, who exhibit a sense of shame and
moral dread, who are learned in the Dhamma, energetic in cultivation
of the mind, mindful, and possessed of wisdom. Resorting to such good
friends, looking to them as mentors and guides, the good person
pursues these same qualities as his own ideals and absorbs them into
his character. Thus, while drawing ever closer to deliverance himself,
he becomes in turn a beacon light for others. Such a one is able to
offer those who still wander in the dark an inspiring model to
emulate, and a wise friend to turn to for guidance and advice.
* * * * * * * *
THE BUDDHIST PUBLICATION SOCIETY
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* * * * * * * *
DISTRIBUTION AGREEMENT
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TITLE OF WORK: Association with the Wise (BPS Newsletter Cover
Essay, No. 26, 1st Mailing 1994)
FILENAME: ESSAY_26.ZIP
AUTHOR: Bhikkhu Bodhi
AUTHOR'S ADDRESS: Buddhist Publication Society
P.O. Box 61
54, Sangharaja Mawatha
Kandy, Sri Lanka
PUBLISHER'S ADDRESS: <same>
COPYRIGHT HOLDER: Buddhist Publication Society (1994)
DATE OF PUBLICATION: 1994
RIGHTS AND RESTRICTIONS: See paragraph below.
DATE OF DHARMANET DISTRIBUTION: December 1994
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